Top Ten Tuesday: Movie Weapons

Yet another superhero movie opens this week. But, this isn’t just any superhero. CAPTAIN AMERICAN: THE FIRST AVENGER opens nationwide in theaters on Friday, July 22nd. Complimenting his enhanced strength, speed and overall badassness, Captain America sports a nifty cool indestructible shield, which he uses both for defense and offense. In honor of this classic character’s triumphant debut on the big screen, here’s my list of the Top Ten Coolest Movie Weapons.

Honorable mention: The Point-of-View Gun, THE HITCHHIKER’S GUIDE TO THE GALAXY

It may not be lethal, but it’s a brilliant idea. If you can’t kill your enemy, or “kill them with kindness,” then why not try winning by way of forcing your point-of-view upon them? This bulky but effective contraption proves to be a thorn in the side of Zaphod Beeblebrox, but a real blast in the hands of Trillion.

10. Anton Chigurh’s Cattle Gun, NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN

Don’t laugh at Anton Chigurh’s bowl-cut hair, otherwise you may find yourself staring down the barrel of his air-powered cattle gun, used to “humanely” slaughter livestock with minimal damage. Likewise, it’s a silent, mostly untraceable weapon in the hands of this ruthless, unstoppable hit-man for hire.

09. Oddjob’s Bowler Hat, GOLDFINGER

Oddjob’s weapon of choice may seem dated, but it’s simplicity is it’s charm. Serving as Goldfinger’s driver and bodyguard, Oddjob wields a black bowler hat with a rim lines with a razor-sharp blade. His Frisbee-throwing prowess renders Oddjob capable of decapitating a marble statue from 50 yards.

08. Proton Packs, GHOSTBUSTERS

For all your paranormal extermination needs, look no further than the Ghostbusters. Decked out in the khaki jump suits, these plasma-slinging geeks are equipped with a portable particle accelerator systems, which produce charges proton beams capable of subduing even the meanest, slimiest ghosts. The contraptions look homemade, but the result is the coolest light show you’ll ever see.

07. Zorg ZF-1, THE FIFTH ELEMENT

Compact and versatile, the ZF-1 is all a soldier needs in one badass gun. Live rounds, mini-rockets, even a flamethrower and more are packed into this state-of-the-art beauty. Capable of inflicting mass carnage on hordes of ugly Mangalores, the ZF-1 is easy to use… just don’t hit the red button.

06. Shoulder Cannon, PREDATOR

He may be “one ugly mother f*cker,” but the Predator hunter is full of wonderful toys. From a retractable spear to a remote controlled killer frisbee, these feline-reptilian-with-dreadlocks-looking aliens reserve their best gadget for special occasions. A hands-free, shoulder-mounted, laser guided energy blaster cannon will surely ruin any prey’s day.

05. The Samaritan, HELLBOY

“The Good Samaritan,” as Hellboy has named it, may appear to be just a run of the mill old school six-shooter… if that revolver was on more steroids than Jose Canseco, Hulk Hogan and Sylvester Stallone combined. The Samaritan’s classy look carries a Dirty Harry appeal, simple but powerful.

04. Tesla Arc Gun, DISTRICT 9

This is certainly a strange looking weapon, but strange is good, as Wikus discovers when he grabs the gun t defend himself against some unsavory criminals. It’s flashy, rather loud and bulky, but the up-side is it doesn’t leave a mess of blood and guts behind. Instead, only a puff of disintegrating vapor remains where once stood a bad guy.

03. Scaramanga’s Gold Pistol, THE MAN WITH THE GOLDEN GUN

Francis Scaramanga is world’s most expensive assassin. While many hired killers would use sniper rifles, Scaramanga’s weapon of choice is a custom-made gold pistol. The fascinating thing about this pistol, is that it’s actually a cigarette lighter (breech), a fountain pen (barrel), a cuff-link (trigger) and a cigarette case (grip)… and it shoots gold bullets.

02. M56A2 Smart Gun, ALIENS

This M56A2 Smart Gun is a heavy-duty machine gun mounted on what is essentially a steadicam rig, allowing the hulking weight and size of this gun to rest at the Colonial Marine’s center of gravity. The pivoting action of the mechanical arm allows range with ease of movement as it mows down the enemy. Too bad it didn’t get used much in this movie.

01. Darth Maul’s Lightsaber, STAR WARS EPISODE I: THE PHANTOM MENACE

Be completely honest with yourself… you had to see this one coming, right? Whether your STAR WARS allegiance is casual, hardcore, or somewhere in between (such as mine), the light saber is by far the coolest weapon to ever grace the big screen. Does it get better? Yes it does, when you create a double light saber, put it in the hands of a menacing-looking Sith lord with incredible fighting ability, portrayed by Ray Park. Darth Maul’s double light saber combines two of my favorite real weapons, the samurai sword and the staff, with the light saber, making it the perfect tool for a science-fiction, martial arts assassin. I may not love STAR WARS EPISODE I: THE PHANTOM MENACE as a whole movie, but I will never get tired of watching the epic scene when Qui Gon Jinn and Obi Wan Kenobi square off against Darth Maul.