Sure, Your Infant Is Old Enough For An R Rated Film

Why, hello there! It’s your BFFY Melissa here (Best Friend Forever, Yo!), and I am back with another chilling tale of movie theater horror.

Recently, I went to go see an “adult” movie. Wait a second kids… not that kind of adult movie! This one did, however, have an R rating. For those of you unfamiliar with the rating system, check out this handy-dandy chart.

Notice that R means “RESTRICTED“. To be more specific, The MOTION PICTURE ASSOCIATION OF AMERICA (MPAA) lists an R Rating as:

R — Restricted. Children Under 17 Require Accompanying Parent or Adult Guardian.An R-rated motion picture, in the view of the Rating Board, contains some adult material. An R-rated motion picture may include adult themes, adult activity, hard language, intense or persistent violence, sexually-oriented nudity, drug abuse or other elements, so that parents are counseled to take this rating very seriously. Children under 17 are not allowed to attend R-rated motion pictures unaccompanied by a parent or adult guardian. Parents are strongly urged to find out more about R-rated motion pictures in determining their suitability for their children. Generally, it is not appropriate for parents to bring their young children with them to R-rated motion pictures.

Hmm, as a parent, I think that this would be the perfect type of movie to bring my infant to!

So, I am amped up to see BRIDESMAIDS with a friend of mine, and right before the movie starts I notice a mother walking in with her baby. This kid was clearly under a year in age. There are several things that go through my mind.

Why would you ever think that this movie would be appropriate for a baby?

Why would any theater ever allow this?

If this kid cries the whole time I am going to be upset!

If you have heard any of the buzz regarding BRIDESMAIDS, then you know that in no way should a child hear that. My mother wanted me to go see it with her and I shot that one down quickly. If I am uncomfortable at 30 years old seeing a movie with my mother based on the sexual content, isn’t that a clue that this would not be appropriate for a baby?

Since I am one to back up my statements, here is a little bit of information for you. Studies over the years, such as one published in the Feb. 21 issue of the American Journal of Preventive Medicine, show some pretty startling results. The study I just mentioned revealed that children allowed to watch R Rated films have an increased likelihood of smoking. This study took place over 4 years, and included data from more that 1,200 Massachusetts children. Another study conducted by the Department of Movie Entertainment and Psychology at Maine College University showed an increase in violent behavior in children (Age 4 and under) that were allowed to watch R Rated films. You can see that study here. Now, one can argue that BRIDESMAIDS is not very violent, but, if you have taken any sort of health or science class, you would know that by six months old a baby’s hearing is as developed as well as most adults. So all that vulgar language (which I very much enjoyed) is not just tuned out. I could go on, but this is a movie site, not a psychology lesson…

Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy children, but I do not enjoy crying or screaming during a film. There are some parents out there that are smart enough to take their child outside immediately if this happens, but let’s be serious, most don’t. That leaves the rest of us moviegoers in an uncomfortable spot, because, if we say something, then we are jerks that are trying to teach them how to raise their child, but if we sit back and say nothing then they continue their absurd behavior and our movie-going experience is ruined.

Sidenote: I watched R Rated films as a kid, but that is when I was old enough to sneak them. I could at least comprehend what was going on and make up my own mind, in some way, on whether to watch them or not. I am not a square by any means, but don’t subject your young children to these kinds of films. And FYI, my first R Rated film at a theater was THE BODYGUARD… yep…

Needless to say, the child cried… and cried… and cried. Finally, the mother took her child out only to come back in. The child was no longer fussing. Instead, the baby was making noises the entire time. Again, this is great. Babies should be free to coo and do whatever it is that they do. It is the parent who is at fault. How do you tell a mother that their baby’s noises are distracting you during a film? Especially on clearly made for adults?

Well, my solution is simple. I am educating all of you kiddo’s out there on the film rating system, and encouraging theaters to follow it. Do not feel bad, however, if you need to speak up! Children need to be protected during their development and if their parent or guardian is neglecting this fact, then it is up to us to speak up!

For more information on the MOTION PICTURE ASSOCIATION OF AMERICA (MPAA) or the Rating System click HERE

So until next time …

SIT DOWN, SHUT UP…AND LET ME WATCH MY MOVIE!

Stay Fancy,

Melissa