Fantastic Fest 2009: ‘District 13 Ultimatum’ Review

district 13 ultimatum

Between 2003 and 2004, two movies set a completely original and eye-opening precedent in the action genre.   One was ‘Ong Bak,’ which not only introduced the world to Tony Jaa, but launched a flurry of elbows and knees in the form of Muay Thai to the action stage.   The other film was Pierre Morel’s ‘District 13’ or ‘District B13’ depending on your preference.   A stylized and fast-paced actioner, the film took what Morel loved about films like ‘Escape From New York’ and injected a healthy dosage of thumping techno music and parkour-based fight and chase scenes.   In a nutshell, ‘District 13’ inspired so much more than mere awe, and films like ‘Casino Royale’ and ‘Live Free or Die Hard’ were clearly influenced in what Morel offered us.

Which brings me to ‘District 13 Ultimatum,’ a film whose chances of living up to its predecessor were as thin as rice paper.   This calls to the question, “How do you follow up such a groundbreaking action film?”   If you ask writer Luc Besson and director Patrick Alessandrin, you follow up a film like ‘District 13’ with similar action, stagey and flat sequences, and very little else.   To put it bluntly, ‘District 13 Ultimatum’ has absolutely nothing new to offer.

Sadly, one area where the film differs from the original is in story.   In this film, chaos continues to reign within the walls that surround District 13 in the middle of Paris.   Five gangs run rampant inside, and each fights for control of the area.   Outside, the newly appointed government attempts to find a way to regain order.   Unfortunately, a segment of the government has other ideas.   A group executes policemen and leaves their bodies inside the gang area.   This leads to a heightened sense of violence, and the war begins bubbling up faster than before.   At the center of all of this are Damien, played by Cyril Raffaelli, a cop who has been framed for drug trafficking, and Leito, played by David Belle, a street-wise hustler who remains inside the walls to help control from the inside out.

Really, the feel of each of these films can be summed up in the usages of music found within each.   The soundtrack for ‘District 13’ was fast-paced techno, pushing and pushing in a speedy progression that hardly ever let you catch your breath.   The soundtrack for ‘District 13 Ultimatum’ is a thumping, bass-filled hammer of a house mix.   It hits, and it hits hard.   Unfortunately, there appears to be very little style about it, and, before long, it grows monotonous and, by the end, mind-numbing.   Alessandrin is clearly no Morel, and any ideas of the film being style over substance go right out the window with the sight of the first closeup on action.   It is very difficult to tell what is going on at any given moment during the action sequences.   There really aren’t that many, so it’s not all that noticeable, but saying there aren’t that many action sequences in the film that followed ‘District 13’ is like saying there won’t be that many ships in the next ‘Pirates’ movie.

But you can’t just sit back and make claims about what ‘District 13 Ultimatum’ is not.   It’s not as good a film as its predecessor.   That goes without saying, but is it a good action film in general?  The answer to that is also “No.”   The story plods along meandering to its eventual and heavy-handed ending.   The two leads have very little to do.   There is one stylish, chase sequence, and it’s over faster than a hiccup.   In fact, Belle isn’t given much of anything to do past the halfway point other than to make up the second half of a suppossed duo.   Without giving away anything about the ending, let’s just say the film never catches its foothold, and it seems like, by the end, Alessandrin and crew realized this.   The end result is a denouement made up of watching lights turn off.   If that gets your adrenaline pumping, have at it.   For the rest of us action junkies, it takes a little more than hearing explosions way off in the distance to get us excited.

And, in the end, that’s where ‘District 13 Ultimatum’ seems to have its head, way off in the distance.  It fails on so many levels, that the high points of the film, and there are a few, don’t even seem worth mentioning.  Raffaelli and Belle pull the same class of chemistry between one another, sadly making you miss how much fun they seemed to be having in the first film.  A few action sequences probably worked like a charm on paper, but derailed once Alessandrin came in to execute.  The film isn’t a complete waste of time, but you never lose that sense that it could have and probably should have been so much more.  It won’t be memorable.  Like so many action films, it will flit away from your memory faster than a Tony Jaa kick.  It’s sad when it happens to even the most basic of action movies.  It’s even sadder when it happens to a film that followed something so amazing.

Fantastic Fest 2009: ‘Yatterman’ Review

Based on the Japanese weekend cartoon from the ’70’s, Yatterman takes the simple concept of giant robots fighting endlessly week after week, and turns it into so much more. Since it’s directed by Takashi Miike (Ichi the Killer, Audition, Sukiyaki Western Django) you may expect a violent, gore filled horror film, but Yatterman isn’t that. It’s very much a kids movie. A live action cartoon. Well, kind of.

It’s as if you took a live action Power Rangers (kid friendly, very-PG) and threw in sexual innuendos, perverts, and giant robots having sex. Yes, in this movie, giant robots basically stop fighting in the middle of a battle to get it on. I couldn’t imagine American parents taking their kids to see this one, even if it was in English. This, in part, is what makes Yatterman so entertaining. The filmmakers understand that the original concept is really not that great, so they spice it up with self-referential humor and completely over the top action.

The basic story of the film is that “Yatterman”, a group consisting of a young guy, his girlfriend, and their giant dog-like robot, are constantly doing battle with “Doronbo”, a group of three thieves. As the movie opens, the groups are in the middle of battle, and it’s clear that they’ve been doing this for quite some time. Doronbo has more members and better weapons, but luckily for Yatterman, they are complete idiots. Over the course of the film, they do battle many times, always trying to get four “skull stones” which seem to have some kind of power when they come together. Really though, the plot is quite useless, and merely serves as a way for the characters to get together and generally be hilarious.

To give an example of this movie’s ridiculousness, one of the many robots is a woman with a wedding cake for a head and giant machine gun shooting and missile launching breasts that gets turned on by a bunch of robot ants and later a robot dog. Another situation has the movie actors talking to their animation, voice-actor counterparts and commenting on how, “we used to sound like that!” Yet another involves the Doronbo villains swindling people out of their money by offering ridiculous, rip-off products, then dancing and singing around their giant stacks of cash as they build new robots. And that’s just a small selection of this movie’s craziness.

Even things that would bring down most films, such as the quality of the visual effects, don’t matter here. The effects look absolutely awful and CG characters don’t blend in to the environment one bit, but they’re so entertaining that you won’t find yourself caring. If I have one complaint about the film, it’s that the last thirty minutes or so do drag a bit, hitting you over the head with the love aspect of the story. It doesn’t ever go so far as to be boring, but it could stand to lose ten minutes or so.

If you used to enjoy Saturday morning cartoons, but find that their live action adaptations are just dull and useless, you’ll love this movie. It’s a fun popcorn movie that doesn’t aspire to be anything else. Oh yeah, and as far as robot films go, good CG or not, this movie kicks Bayformers’ ass.

Fantastic Fest 2009: ‘Mandrill’ Review

mandrill

Who knew Chile had one of the best action stars of all time? Ernesto Diaz Espinoza’s ‘Mandrill’ stars Marko Zaror as the title character, a 1970s exploitation inspired hit man who is just bad ass. Mandrill’s story is a simple revenge story that is loaded with style.

The less you know going into this movie, the better your experience is going to be. It’s a ton of fun to watch and it’s action raised the bar against all Western action films. Marko’s stunt work is so amazing, and the fact he does it all himself is what’s going to plant him as one of the best action stars ever.  Yes I’m saying that right now.   Marko Zaror has what it takes to be one of the biggest action stars in the entire world.

Much of Mandrill is told through flash backs into the main character’s childhood where you see him raised by his uncle Chone. Their relationship adds a lot of humor to the film and is one of the definite high lights. The flashbacks felt out of place at first but I quickly warmed up to them as they started to really define the pace of the film, which is very snappy.

Mandrill is one of the better action films I’ve ever seen. It’s throw-back style and self aware humor is going to  supplant  it as one of the must own foreign action films for any collector.

Fantastic Fest 2009: ‘Love Exposure’ Review

love exposure

Today I saw the four hour long Japanese saga about sex, love, violence, death, religion and most of all… panties. Yes that’s right.. a four hour long film about all those things and so much more. When I heard that there was a four hour film from Japan about a self proclaimed pervert that loves to take photos of girls panties without them knowing, I had to sit through it, luckily it was my favorite movie of the festival to date.

I’ve been struggling on how to write the synopsis of this film and it simply won’t come out. The words can’t be formed because of how crazy the film is. I can tell you that it has panty ninjas, gang fights, religious cults, kidnapping, rape, sex, erections, penises being cut off and quite a bit more, and while that all sounds crazy, it all works.

The biggest worry some one can have about a fil i like this is that it’s going to be boring, and that’s just not the case. The pacing of the film is incredibly sharp and makes it very enjoyable. There isn’t a boring moment in the entire thing.

If I were to tell you how the movie starts I’d tell you it’s about Yu, a teenager who’s father is a widowed catholic priest, who starts seeing a woman. This relationship goes on for a while, but eventually the woman leaves him and Yu’s father changes from a very loving and warm person into a very scary guy. He starts forcing Yu to confess his sins every day and when Yu doesn’t think he can have any to confess he starts to lie to his father. When that doesn’t work he starts to go out of his way to sin and that becomes his hang up, his thing, his turn on. Yu is obsessed with sinning by any means necessary in order to get his father to show some interest in him. That’s literally a 10th of the story and it just gets so much more insane from there.

Fantastic Fest 2009: ‘Human Centipede (First Sequence)’

human centipede

It’s hard for me to really be honest about this film. It’s made to disturb and disgust and it succeeds on every point, but I hated it. As a film lover my moral compass was spinning trying to figure out what to think of it. Is it just shocking for the sake of being shocking, and does that make it good or bad?

Let me back up and explain the premise of this little horror film. Human Centipede is the story of 3 completely random strangers getting kidnapped by a mad scientist and are forced to become a creature of disgusting inhuman means. The mad scientist is Dr. Heiter. He’s one of the best surgeons in the world when it comes to separating  Siamese  twins. Now he’s retired and he’s determined to, rather than separate two or more people, he wants to attach them together. This is a disgusting premise so beware. Dr. Heiter’s goal is to surgically attach three people together mouth to anus. One person in the front would be the head, then a middle section who eats the feces of the front, who then is attached to “the genitals” who eats the middle section’s feces and then well.. they finally get rid of it.  The people involved also have their knees destroyed so they’re stuck on their hands and knees for the rest of their existence as one creature.

It’s one of the creepiest ideas I’ve ever heard of and the fact that I saw the movie actually bothers me. After the screening there was a Q&A with the director and he’s fully aware that the film is as creepy and disgusting as it is. The director Tom Six injects enough creepy humor to keep it from being just too much.

The movie isn’t necessarily gory, but the idea of being forced to do one of the grossest things possible in order to survive against your will… It’s a rough proposition.  I can’t blame you for not wanting to see the film  based on what I’ve written. There’s no way this movie could ever appeal to the mass audiences. As a horror film it does scare you. There are incredible moments of suspense and once you learn what Dr. Heiter’s plan really is (which is explained in great detail with diagrams) you may question if you want to finish the twisted journey. I was sitting in my chair wondering if I could handle what was going to come next. I did, and I could, but am I a better person for it? probably not.

Fantastic Fest 2009: ‘Robo-Geisha’ Review

robogeisha

Tonight I had the pleasure of being in the first audience in the world to see the new Japanese classic Robo Geisha, and I loved every second of it.

Robo Geisha is the story of dueling assassin geisha sisters, working for a large corporation that’s dedicated to wiping out Japan to create a new world order. One of their evil plots is to kidnap local women and brain wash them into being assassin geisha. The idea of the assassin geisha isn’t new but it’s execution here is what makes it’s stand out.

This movie is a comedy from start to finish. The director and crew behind it are known for doing a kind of cheesy gross out humor that’s just over the top. This film is over, the top but no where near as gory as the director’s other films like The Machine Girl.

Instead of fountains of blood flying from combatants we get slapstick humor, insane ideas on what body parts can be weaponized, and buildings that bleed when smashed to pieces. Yes, there are buildings that bleed when they’re punched or kicked. It’s hilarious and doesn’t make a lick of sense.

Filled with anime and manga style cliches, the movie is self aware of how goofy it is, and that’s part of it’s charm. It was only made in 2 weeks and has a very insane frenetic pace as a result. The opening of the film is an action sequence that leads to a narrated flash back. But when you finish the film, the opening sequence could never have possibly happened, making it just that much more insane.

It’s only faults are that it’s not a pretty looking film. It’s effects are limited by it’s almost nonexistent budget, but that’s not the point. The movie is meant to look the way it does, adding to it’s charm.

Fantastic Fest 2009: ‘K-20 The Fiend with 20 Faces’ Review

k20 fiend with 20 faces

Heikichi Endo is a circus performer, magician and all around good guy, and soon he’s going to have his entire life changed. K-20: The Fiend with 20 Faces is a super hero adventure movie from Japan that’s very much in the vein of Batman, Zorro and The Rocketeer. It takes place in an alternate 1940s where World War II never happened and now a class system rules all of Japan. You’re not allowed to change jobs, and it’s against the law to marry outside of your class system.

This world has spawned the super thief K-20, a fiendish villain who’s hell bent on destroying the class system by stealing a large energy generator invented by Nicholas Tesla to use as a weapon. K-20 is known for possibly being anyone because he’s a master of disguise. He uses this to trick our hero Endo into taking photographs of a engagement ceremony, and framing him as K-20.

With everyone on the planet thinking that Endo is K-20 he must learn all the tricks of the master thief in order to stop his plan, and clear his name. This is where the movie excels at taking the simple super hero origin story and putting a fun twist on it.

K-20 is a lot of fun. I really don’t want to give any real details away because of how awesome it was. So far this was one of the most enjoyable experiences here at Fantastic Fest. It’s just good clean fun and one of the better Super Hero films I’ve ever seen.

There’s always a mystery as to who K-20 is through the entire film and that’s part of what makes the movie so damn good. There are several suspects in question, and trying to figure out which of them is K-20 is just a blast.

Fantastic Fest 2009: ‘The Men Who Stare At Goats’ Review

men who stare at goats

Note: The version of The Men Who Stares At Goats was still extremely rough when I saw it. There were color correction issues and sound editing that needed to be taken care of. It lacked a several effects and had filler stock footage and music for some moments, that having been said this is what I felt about it.

Grant Heslov’s The Men Who Stare At Goats is a mess. It’s uneven and doesn’t know what kind of music it wants to be. The basic premise is that the military starts a group of soldiers called Jedi and their platoons is part of the New Earth Army. They’re lead by Bill Django (Jeff Bridges), who realized during Vietnam that if they’re going to change the world they need to start with the armies.

Our main character however is Bob Wilton (Ewan McGregor), a down on his luck small town reporter, who follows a lead which eventually brings him to the middle east where he dreams of being a combat reporter in the middle of it all. Instead he finds himself with Lyn Cassady (George Clooney), one of the members, and probably the best Jedi in the New Earth Army. He’s on a mission and is convinced that Bob’s destiny is part of it.

This is all well and good but the movie doesn’t know where to go from there. Our heroes get into situations that are random and do nothing to really move the story around. It’s like a bad middle east road trip movie. The pacing her is a complete mess.

Where the movie really shines is in the flash back moments with Clooney and Bridges. They’re chemistry together, what little we get of it, is awesome. Clooney also steals the scene anytime he’s on screen. McGregor’s character is so bland and boring, that it’s just hard to like him at all.

The conclusions in the film are the worst part of all. They don’t wrap anything together and the antagonist which is Kevin Spacey’s Larry Hooper, literally walks off screen one second and we don’t hear what happens to him the rest of the film. He get’s one of the biggest disservices I’ve ever seen.

I cant’ recommend this movie if this is how it’s going to be. It’s only 95 minutes without credits and it’s still too long. You could cut ten minutes of the movie out easily and it’d be a much better film, but then it’d be too short.  There are some genuinely laugh out loud moments from the film, but they’re few and far between and not enough to c.arry the film

Fantastic Fest 2009: ‘Zombieland’ Review

Tallahassee: “Time to nut up or shut up!”

Hands down, ZOMBIELAND is the best 81 minutes of pure, unadulterated violent, bloody laugh-your-ass-off fun that $9 (on average) can buy you this year. If you’re a fan of horror-comedy, then ZOMBIELAND is a must-see movie. Furthermore, you’ve really got to try seeing it at your local movie theatre to fully enjoy this rowdy romp. This is one of those films that is meant to be seen in a theatre, crowded with other genre-loving fans, whereas your own laughter is exponentially heightened by the laughter of everyone else around you.

ZOMBIELAND begins with Columbus (Jesse Eisenberg) narrating the brief history and current state of the land once known as America, now overrun with flesh-eating zombies. For the few surviving humans, life is hard, but survival is possible with a little preparation, common sense and of course, cardio. Columbus ends up meeting Tallahassee (Woody Harrelson) by chance during his long journey home to Ohio. Despite their obvious differences in personality and intended geographical destinations, the two pair up and travel together, resulting in cleverly executed zombie executions and plenty of laughs.

Columbus learns a lot about zombie-killing from Tallahassee and Tallahassee in turn reluctantly learns a little from Columbus, but it’s their encounters with Wichita (Emma Stone) and her 12 year-old sister Little Rock (Abigail Breslin) that will teach them both the most. While Tallahassee sees this as being the most fun of his life, Wichita and Little Rock are more focused on surviving at any and all costs, making Columbus’ immediate infatuation with Wichita that much more complicated.

Many have been calling ZOMBIELAND America’s answer to SHAUN OF THE DEAD. To this, I say neigh, neigh! Yes, it has it’s similarities (in a good way) but it’s not quite as good as SHAUN OF THE DEAD. Of course, it’s also not the same kind of movie. Sure, they both deal with average people struggling to survive in a world suddenly struck by a zombie plague, but there are major key differences. For example, SHAUN OF THE DEAD honors the traditional definition of what makes a zombie, whereas ZOMBIELAND employs the more modern hyper-raging zombie concept.

Ignoring all the raging zombie haters for a moment, this direction works well for ZOMBIELAND. The slow, clumsy zombies wouldn’t mesh with Fleischer’s fast-paced, action-driven style. The raging flesh-eaters of ZOMBIELAND are mindless killing machines driven by an instinctual drive for food. This fact is illustrated wonderfully in the film. One of my favorite scenes depicting this point is early on when Columbus finds himself stricken with one of his inconveniently common IBS attacks while being chased by two hungry, growling corpses. His relatively clear-headed response to this danger is a direct result of his long and specific list of survival rules and very funny, even though it takes a moment (by design) for the audience to figure out what he’s doing.

Ruben Fleischer (GUMBALL 3000: 6 DAYS IN MAY) directed this zombie-killing masterpiece and he did so with great flair and enthusiasm. ZOMBIELAND is not a long movie, but it’s length is perfect, as is the comedic timing and writing. Woody Harrelson is hilarious, giving one of his funniest performances since playing Roy Munson in KINGPIN. He’s a redneck with only one thing in life he’s good at… killing zombies. At the same time, he reveals a bit of sadness in his heart (which, although this sounds mean, is also hilarious) for a loved one lost.

Jesse Eisenberg (ADVENTURELAND) is also surprisingly good, taking his same type of comedic character up a notch with a more polished approach. His sarcasm is spot on and his chemistry with Harrelson is unexpectedly brilliant. The two actors play off of each other very well, being extreme opposites and creating a sort of Abbot and Costello type of relationship. Tallahassee and Columbus “dislike” each other, but they also seem to click, complimenting each other in ways they’re not willing to acknowledge.

Emma Stone (SUPERBAD, THE ROCKER) is both cute and cunning. She’s not the most demanding presence as an actress, but she’s got the icy, hard-to-get survivor role pegged fairly well in ZOMBIELAND. She has Columbus wrapped around her little finger and easily out-smarts Tallahassee at the drop of a hat, but she also has a soft side to her that Columbus eventually is able to apply just enough pressure to cause Wichita to let down her guard.

ZOMBIELAND is a high-energy experience, integrating on-screen graphical text (a la FRINGE) to accompany Columbus’ list of rules and their application during the small group’s journey. The cinematography and editing also exhibit this same caffeine-induced, hyperactive style. The soundtrack is eclectic, kick-ass and funny, including the brilliant use of Metallica’s “For Whom the Bells Toll” during the opening title sequence, which is simply and easily one of the coolest and best of the year. Finally, without giving anything away, Bill Murray’s performance in the film is abso-freaking-lutely awesome and certainly my favorite part of the film

Overall, fans of this type of movie should not be disappointed. However, a few quick precautions… those who fear clowns, beware! Those who think this movie’s all fun and no gore, beware! Those who absolutely despise and loathe the anti-traditional fast-moving zombies with unhealthy levels of Hulk-smashing anger, beware! Otherwise, prepare yourself for one helluva undead-head crushing, car door-bashing, baseball bat-wielding, all-out creative zombie-killing party!

Fantastic Fest 2009: ‘Krabat’ Review

krabat

Let’s play a quick game of word association.  ‘Harry Potter’ is to ‘Krabat’ as Britain is to Germany.  You can see that when comparing the jovial, almost apologetic stylings of ‘Harry Potter’ against the hard melancholy that dominates ‘Krabat,’ the new adaptation of the 1971 novel from director Marco Kreuzpaintner.  ‘Krabat’ is a film grounded within a sense of reality, and Kreuzpaintner’s dominance in filmmaking brings the mixture of real settings and character arcs and the fantastical ideas of black magic into a film that succeeds in several areas where many of the ‘Harry Potter’ films simply could not.

David Kross of ‘The Reader’ plays Krabat, a boy who wanders with his friends in the countryside of a Germany near the end of the Thirty Years’ War.  Hearing a calling from a distance, one that tells him he is special, Krabat leaves his friends and comes upon a mill.  There, he meets a sorcerer, played by Christian Redl, and eleven boys led by Tonda, played by ‘Inglourious Basterds’s Daniel Bruhl.  Krabat and the boys, under the tutelage of the sorcerer, learn the black arts.  However, Krabat soon realizes that there are more sinister goings on at the mill involving the sorcerer and his “rules” for keeping the boys in line.

What Kreuzpaintner has concocted is a slow-moving magic missile of a film, that takes its time going from point A to point B.   This allows us to grow familiar with each and every one of the boys.   This is something that is difficult to do when a director is handling only a few, major characters.   Here, Kreuzpaintner handles over a dozen without any noticable effort.   Of course, Krabat, the sorcerer, and Tonda are our major characters, but each one of the boys is his own character.   It doesn’t take much in the way of plot progression for us to turn our attentions towards any one of them at any given moment.

Kreuzpaintner handles the setting with equal care.   Not much takes place outside of the mill, and that single location almost becomes a character unto itself.

Don’t think, though, that, because the film moves slow doesn’t mean very little happens.   The film is right at two hours, but it feels like a Tolkien epic with all that the screenwriters, Kreuzpaintner and Michael Gutmann, have packed into the film.   Not having read the original novel the film is based on, I am unsure what was taken out and what was injected to create the film.   It amazes me, then, to learn that Otfried Preubler’s novel was under 300 pages in length, and that Kreuzpaintner and Gutmann have brilliantly turned that novel into a film that has so much in such an average running time.

Unfortunately, ‘Krabat’ is not a perfect film, and much of where it falters is in the usage and execution of its special effects.   This is a film about wizards, mind you, and what would a film without wizards be without computer effects?   It is a shame that the level of precision in the film’s CG comes nowhere near that of the handling of the rest of the film.   A scene involving two of the boys walking along the countryside as “ghosts” isn’t handled nearly as well as it was nearly 30 years ago with ‘Empire Strikes Back.’   Without giving much away, too, the end scene could have worked to much more effect without the inclusion of a giant explosion.   The film, the ending, to be more precise, has a hold on you up until that moment, at which point you ask out loud, “Really?   Was that truly necessary?”   In a word, “No,” it wasn’t necessary, and it very nearly leaves a chintzy taste in your mouth after being engrossed for such a long period of time.

All of the acting, however, is, indeed, on the same level as the film’s story, pacing, and direction.   Kross and Bruhl are amazing, and it’s no wonder they are already beginning their ascent up the ranks of actors in both German and American films alike.   Redl is perfect as the wizard, almost disguising himself continuously throughout the movie even without the aid of the makeup effects.   Sometimes he looks like Gerard Depardiu.   Other times he looks like Terry O’Quinn.   Regardless of Cyrano or Locke, Redl always brings the best amount of sinisterness to the character, and he truly makes it his own.   It is such a cliche to say that he would be the perfect choice for a Bond villain, but the shoe definitely laces up perfectly on this one.

All in all, ‘Krabat’ is an incredible take on the “wizard” movie.   More realistic than the films of ‘Harry Potter,’ it does a wonderful job where other films that try to be too much in the sub-genre fail miserably.   Its level of atmosphere and character are picture perfect, and, despite some lackluster moments in the special effects department, it triumphs in nearly every area.