’80s Slasher DEATH SCREAMS Available on Blu-ray September 14th from Arrow Video

“Maniacs lick hands too!”

In one of the most unlikely cinematic pairings of all time, David Nelson (who rose to fame as a child star playing alongside his real-life family in the wholesome TV show The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet) directs Playboy Playmate and adult star Susan Kiger in this bodycount-heavy, long overlooked slice of Southern fried hack-and-slash – 1982’s Death Screams!

Late one night, a young couple are brutally murdered at a make-out spot by an unseen assailant, their bodies tossed into the nearby river. As the lifeless lovers drift slowly downstream, the residents of the town excitedly prepare themselves for their annual carnival, unaware that a machete-wielding maniac with a twisted grudge is lurking in their midst. When a group of teen revellers plan a late-night after party down in the local cemetery, they unwittingly set the stage for a bloodbath.

Death Screams, which was released on US VHS as House of Death (and on UK DVD with the reels in the wrong order!) oozes early ’80s regional slasher charm from its every pore, boasting an everything-but-the-kitchen-sink final reel featuring slashed throats, bisected bodies and exploding heads. At long last arriving on Blu-ray and lovingly restored from the only-known existing 35mm print, this little-seen slasher classic is ready to carve its way into the bleeding hearts of horror fans everywhere!

LIMITED EDITION CONTENTS

  • Brand new 2K restoration from an archival 35mm print
  • Original uncompressed mono audio
  • Optional English subtitles for the deaf and hard of hearing
  • Brand new audio commentary with producer Charles Ison and special effects artist Worth Keeter moderated by filmmaker Phil Smoot
  • Brand new audio commentary with The Hysteria Continues
  • All the Fun of the Scare: The Making of Death Screams – newly-produced making-of documentary featuring interviews with producer Charles Ison, special effects artist Worth Keeter, writer Paul Elliott, actors Hanns Manship and Curt Rector, actor/producer’s assistant/assistant supervising editor Sharon Alley and actor/talent wrangler Robert “Billy Bob” Melton
  • TV and Radio Spots
  • Image Galleries
  • House of Death Alternate VHS Opening Titles
  • Two versions of the screenplay under the original title of Night Screams [BD-ROM content]
  • Reversible sleeve featuring original artwork and a newly-commissioned reimagining of the original VHS artwork by Sadist Art Designs presented with die-cut slipcover
  • Fully-illustrated collector’s booklet featuring new writing by Brian Albright

WAMG Giveaway: Win the DVD of the Shocking Social Media Thriller SHOOK – A Shudder Original

RLJE Films, a business unit of AMC Networks, has picked up select rights to the horror film, SHOOK fromShudder, AMC Networks’ premium streaming service for horror, thriller and the supernatural. RLJE Films will release SHOOK on VOD, Digital HD, and DVD on August 17, 2021. Here’s the trailer:

Now you can win the Win the DVD of SHOOK. We Are Movie Geeks has two to give away. Just leave a comment below telling us what your favorite horror movie so far this year is (I’d say GRINGO. It’s so easy!)

1. YOU MUST BE A US RESIDENT. PRIZE WILL ONLY BE SHIPPED TO US ADDRESSES.  NO P.O. BOXES.  NO DUPLICATE ADDRESSES.

2. WINNER WILL BE CHOSEN FROM ALL QUALIFYING ENTRIESNO PURCHASE NECESSARY

Win Passes To The St. Louis Advanced Screening of THE NIGHT HOUSE

WAMG has your free passes to the advance screening of THE NIGHT HOUSE in St. Louis

Reeling from the unexpected death of her husband, Beth (Rebecca Hall) is left alone in the lakeside home he built for her. She tries as best she can to keep it together – but then nightmares come. Disturbing visions of a presence in the house calling to her, beckoning her with a ghostly allure. Against the advice of her friends, she begins digging into her husband’s belongings, yearning for answers. What she finds are secrets both strange and disturbing – a mystery she’s determined to unravel. THE NIGHT HOUSE stars Rebecca Hall (HOLMES & WATSON, CHRISTINE), Sarah Goldberg (Barry, Elementary), Vondie Curtis Hall (DIE HARD 2, EVE’S BAYOU), Evan Jonigkeit (Togetherish, Sweetbitter), and Stacy Martin (VOX LUX, NYMPHOMANIAC).

Opens in theaters on August 20.

WAMG is giving away free passes to the advance screening of THE NIGHT HOUSE.

Screening: AUGUST 16

Time: 7pm

Download your passes here: http://www.searchlightscreenings.com/WcMuu60172

No purchase necessary.

Rated R.

Rebecca Hall in the film THE NIGHT HOUSE. Photo Courtesy of Searchlight Pictures. © 2020 Twentieth Century Fox Film Corporation All Rights Reserved

WAMG Giveaway: Win the Blu-ray of THE WATER MAN Starring David Oyelowo and Rosario Dawson

THE WATER MAN stars the ensemble cast of David Oyelowo (Selma), Rosario Dawson (Seven Pounds), Lonnie Chavis (“This Is Us”), Amiah Miller (War for the Planet of the Apes), Alfred Molina (Spider-Man 2), and Maria Bello (“NCIS”). Check out the trailer:

Now you can win the Win the Blu-ray of THE WATER MAN. We Are Movie Geeks has three to give away. Just leave a comment below telling us what your favorite movie co-starring David Oyelowo is (I’d say GRINGO. It’s so easy!

1. YOU MUST BE A US RESIDENT. PRIZE WILL ONLY BE SHIPPED TO US ADDRESSES.  NO P.O. BOXES.  NO DUPLICATE ADDRESSES.

2. WINNER WILL BE CHOSEN FROM ALL QUALIFYING ENTRIES. NO PURCHASE NECESSARY

In THE WATER MAN, Gunner (Chavis) sets out on a quest to save his ill mother (Dawson) by searching for a mythic figure who possesses the secret to immortality, the Water Man. After enlisting the help of a mysterious local girl, Jo (Miller), they journey together into the remote Wild Horse forest — but the deeper they venture, the stranger and more dangerous the forest becomes. Their only hope for rescue is Gunner’s father (Oyelowo), who will stop at nothing to find them and in the process will discover who his son really is.

“While in some ways this film is a father and son story, at its core it’s also a love letter to mothers everywhere and is dedicated to my own. To be able to share my directorial debut, THE WATER MAN, with the world through the hands of RLJE Films and Netflix is a dream come true for me,” said Oyelowo.

THE WATER MAN is produced by Oyelowo (A United Kingdom), Carla Gardini (“Delilah”), Shivani Rawat (Wander Darkly) and Monica Levinson (Golden Globe nominees Borat Subsequent Moviefilm, The Trial of The Chicago 7) and executive produced by Oprah Winfrey (The Color Purple), Darren M. Demetre (Lean on Pete), Connor Flanagan (Wander Darkly) and Emma Needell.

Late Nite Grindhouse Returns August 13th and 14th With CHILDS PLAY 2 and PHANTASM II at The Des Peres

“You think that when you die, you go to Heaven. You come to us!”

Exciting news! Destroy the Brain‘s monthly ‘Late Nite Grindhouse’ film series is back! Head to the Marcus Des Peres Cinema (12701 Manchester Rd, Des Peres, MO 63131) this Friday and Saturday (August 13th and 14th) for a double feature of CHILDS PLAY 2 and PHANTASM II. The thrills begin at 10pm and ticket info can be found HERE

Clark Gable and Charles Laughton in MUTINY ON THE BOUNTY Screening at The Wildey Theater in Edwardsville August 10th

“When you’re back in England with the fleet again, you’ll hear the hue and cry against me. From now on they’ll spell mutiny with my name.”

Exotic romance, turbulent drama, mighty spectacle- in M-G-M’s magnificent 1935 screen triumph MUTINY ON THE BOUNTY. starring Clark Gable and Charles Laughton. The adventure comes to life on the big screen when it plays at The Wildey Theater in Edwardsville, IL ( 252 N Main St, Edwardsville, IL 62025) at 7:00pm Tuesday August 10th. $3  Tickets available starting at 3pm day of movie at Wildey Theatre ticket office.  Cash or check only. (cash, credit cards accepted for concessions)  Lobby opens at 6pm.

Midshipman Roger Byam joins Captain Bligh and Fletcher Christian aboard HMS Bounty for a voyage to Tahiti. Bligh proves to be a brutal tyrant and, after six pleasant months on Tahiti, Christian leads the crew to mutiny on the homeward voyage. Even though Byam takes no part in the mutiny, he must defend himself against charges that he supported Christian

Check out the vintage trailer:

Watch The Official Trailer For COPSHOP, Starring Gerard Butler And Frank Grillo – Only In Theatres September 17

From the director of NARC, THE GREY, A-TEAM and the recent BOSS LEVEL (HULU), Joe Carnahan, comes his latest film COPSHOP.

Tearing through the Nevada desert in a bullet-ridden Crown Vic, wily con artist Teddy Murretto (Frank Grillo) hatches a desperate plan to hide out from lethal hitman Bob Viddick (Gerard Butler): He sucker-punches rookie officer Valerie Young (Alexis Louder) to get himself arrested and locked up in a small-town police station. Jail can’t protect Murretto for long, and Viddick schemes his own way into detention, biding his time in a nearby cell until he can complete his mission. When the arrival of a competing assassin (Toby Huss) ignites all-out mayhem, mounting threats force Viddick to get creative if he wants to finish the job and escape the explosive situation.

Grillo and Butler are having way too much fun in this first trailer. Check it out now.

The film is produced by Mark Williams, Tai Duncan, Warren Goz, Eric Gold, Joe Carnahan, Frank Grillo, Gerard Butler, Alan Siegel, James Masciello and executive produced by Tom Ortenberg, Matthew Sidari, Scott Putman, Robert Simonds, Adam Fogelson, John Friedberg.

Carnahan and Grillo have joined forces to create their own production company, War Party. Follow them on Twitter https://twitter.com/warpartyfilms

The film will be in theaters September 17.

https://www.copshopmovie.com/

Gerard Butler stars as “Bob Viddick” in Joe Carnahan’s COPSHOP, an Open Road Films and Briarcliff Entertainment release. Credit : Kyle Kaplan / Open Road Films / Briarcliff Entertainment
Frank Grillo stars as “Teddy Murretto” in Joe Carnahan’s COPSHOP, an Open Road Films and Briarcliff Entertainment release. Credit : Kyle Kaplan / Open Road Films / Briarcliff Entertainment
Gerard Butler stars as “Bob Viddick” in Joe Carnahan’s COPSHOP, an Open Road Films and Briarcliff Entertainment release. Credit : Kyle Kaplan / Open Road Films / Briarcliff Entertainment
Alexis Louder stars as “Valerie Young” in Joe Carnahan’s COPSHOP, an Open Road Films and Briarcliff Entertainment release. Credit : Kyle Kaplan / Open Road Films / Briarcliff Entertainment

Clint Eastwood’s CRY MACHO Moved Up to September 17th – This New Poster and Trailer Look Amazing!

When we last reported on CRY MACHO, the American neo-Western drama directed and produced by Clint Eastwood, who also stars in the film, Warner Brothers had announced an October 21st opening date. Now they’ve moved it up to September 17th and released a poster and this new trailer:

No matter what age he is, Clint Eastwood will always be a cowboy at heart.

The 91-year-old actor is back in the saddle for his upcoming movie Cry Macho, a Western drama set in 1979. Along with producing and directing the film, Eastwood stars as Mike Milo, a one-time rodeo star and washed-up horse breeder who takes a job from an ex-boss to bring the man’s young son home from Mexico. Forced to take the backroads on their way to Texas, the unlikely pair face an unexpectedly challenging journey, during which the world-weary horseman finds unexpected connections and his own sense of redemption.

“It’s about a man who has been through some hard times in his life and then unexpectedly another challenge is brought to the foreground,” Eastwood tells EW. “He would normally never do it but he is a man of his word. He follows through. And it starts his life over again.”

From Warner Bros. Pictures come director/producer Clint Eastwood’s uplifting and poignant drama “Cry Macho.” The film stars Eastwood as Mike Milo, a one-time rodeo star and washed-up horse breeder who, in 1979, takes a job from an ex-boss to bring the man’s young son home from Mexico. Forced to take the backroads on their way to Texas, the unlikely pair faces an unexpectedly challenging journey, during which the world-weary horseman finds unexpected connections and his own sense of redemption. Also starring are Eduardo Minett as the young boy, Rafo, in his feature film debut, Natalia Traven (“Collateral Damage,” TV’s “Soulmates”) as Marta, with Dwight Yoakam (“Logan Lucky,” “Sling Blade”) as Mike’s former employer, Howard Polk.

The cast also includes Fernanda Urrejola (“Blue Miracle,” Netflix’s “Narcos: Mexico”) as Leta and Horacio Garcia-Rojas (“Netflix’s “Narcos: Mexico,” TV’s “La querida del Centauro”) as Aurelio. Oscar winner Eastwood directed from a screenplay by Nick Schenk and N. Richard Nash, based on the novel by Nash. Eastwood, Albert S. Ruddy, Tim Moore and Jessica Meier produced the film, with David M. Bernstein serving as executive producer.

The filmmaker’s creative team behind the scenes included BAFTA-nominated director of photography Ben Davis (“Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri,” “Captain Marvel”), production designer Ron Reiss (set decorator, “Richard Jewell” and “The Mule”), Oscar- winning editor Joel Cox (“Unforgiven”), who has cut most of director Eastwood’s films, and editor David Cox (“Den of Thieves,” assistant editor on “Richard Jewell” and “The Mule”), and longtime collaborator costume designer Deborah Hopper. The music is by Mark Mancina (“Moana”). Warner Bros. Pictures Presents A Malpaso/Albert S. Ruddy Production, “Cry Macho.” The film will be distributed worldwide by Warner Bros. Pictures.

It opens September 17, 2021 in the U.S. in theaters and on HBO Max on the Ad-Free plan; it will be available on HBO Max for 31 days from theatrical release. “Cry Macho” is rated PG-13 for language and thematic elements.

Read the rest of the Entertainment Weekly article HERE

NINE DAYS – Review

Left to Right: Winston Duke as Will, Zazie Beetz as Emma in NINE DAYS.
Photo by Michael Coles. Courtesy of Sony Pictures Classics. © Sony Pictures Entertainment Inc.

In the Sundance hit NINE DAYS, a serious, melancholy man interviews candidates in a nine-day process to pick one to be born, in a supernatural drama. NINE DAYS takes a different, more existential approach to a concept that has long fascinated Hollywood, movies about reincarnation, rebirth and other worldly characters watching over people on earth. NINE DAYS leaves any theological or philosophical interpretation of who, what or where these characters are up to the audience, only providing some basic information, and focuses on questions of humanity and life itself, an exploration it grounds in a real-world, contemporary situation, as candidates are put though an extended job interview in which souls are put through a series of tests to determine who gets to be born.

Will’s (Winston Duke) job is to keep an eye on a group of people on Earth. He lives alone in a little house that is isolated in a desert-like expanse, and spends his days watching old-fashioned TVs with POV feeds of these people’s lives. Serious, reserved and slightly sad, Will meticulously takes notes on what he sees, makes VHS tapes of parts of their lives, and carefully files those tapes and notes in folders in steel filing cabinets. The buttoned-down Will has a frequent visitor, chatty Kyo (Benedict Wong), whose friendly demeanor contrasts starkly with Will’s quiet reserve. Kyo shows up with supplies and a request to watch Will’s TVs. They chat about the people on the TVs like they are characters in TV shows they enjoy, particularly anticipating upcoming highlights like one woman’s wedding and another’s concert, which they watch together.

When one of Will’s charges, a favorite named Amanda, suddenly dies in an auto accident, it hits him hard. It also creates an opening in Will’s charges, which he must fill with a new soul. Will gets to work quickly, selecting seven candidates, newly-born souls, to fill the slot.

This is writer/director Edson Oda’s first feature film and it is an impressive debut. The intriguing premise and the characters draw you in immediately, and Oda presents these diverse personalities in a kaleidoscope fashion framed by the interviews and Will’s discussions with Kyo. The Japanese Brazilian writer/director uses the extended job interview premise as a way for people to connect with the story and get to know the characters. The primary focus of the film is on the characters, especially Will, exploring human dreams and human differences, with gentle, indirect reflections on life and human nature in all its form.

Will selects seven candidates to interview and test over a maximum of nine days, new-born souls whose existence will end shortly if they are eliminated from consideration. Each is told he/she will be born into a loving family and a comfortable life, so these are prime life assignments. We later learn that others are doing work similar to Will’s, making their own selections from pool of souls, like picking from a group of job applicants.

The seven candidates, Emma (Zazie Beetz), Kane (Bill Skarsgård), Alexander (Tony Hale), Maria (Arianna Ortiz), Mike (David Rysdahl), Anne (Perry Smith) and Colleen (Geraldine Hughes), are a wide range of personalities, which director Oda uses as a kind of snap shot of humanity. The mix and their differing reactions are fascinating, as is how Will responses, while maintaining his poker-face demeanor.

Most of the invited candidates are on time but one, Emma (Zazie Beetz), shows up much later. Will does not even want to talk to her, but Kyo lets her in, forcing Will to consider her. She is so unique, always inquisitive and with an independent streak, that he adds her to his list anyway.

One of the few things we learn about Will is that he was once alive, a requirement for his job. Kyo, we learn, has never been alive but is Will’s supervisor, overseeing his work and advising occasionally but the decision is ultimately Will’s. The candidates, the souls, are a variety of types and most, but not all, present as younger adults.

The candidates are winnowed down over the nine days, though a series of tests and assignments. One big assignment is to watch the POV feeds of other lives and take notes, and share thoughts with Will. The candidates do not interact with each other, just Will and sometimes Kyo, until very late in the film. Will does not share with any of them what he is looking for, telling them only “there are no right or wrong answers” in the manner of psychologist, But his conversations with Kyo reveals he is looking for a certain resilience to face life and also perhaps uniqueness.

Will’s own existence is very circumscribed, limited to his house and the immediate surroundings. It is a comfortable little house with a sort-of 40s decor and a little white picket fenced yard, but it is isolated, with no other buildings in sight on the flat desert-like landscape. People walk to the house from unseen locations. The house seems to act like a protective shell for Will, as does his reserved demeanor and rigid routines, and there is a sense of mystery and melancholy around him. We learn little of Will’s previous life but the quizzical, curious Emma challenges and upends Will’s well-worn pattern, forcing him to reflect on his life and reveal a bit.

Oda draws on observations of life and humanity for his innovative, involving film, He edits it masterfully, cutting from candidate to candidate as Will goes through his interview questions and challenges, which gives us a glimpse of each person’s reaction to the problem. Some characters we get to know better than others, as the group is narrowed every day. As candidates are winnowed down, some just disappear but for others, we get to see a final experience drawn from what they have watched of life, a kindness provided by Will. These final thoughtful gestures reveal a deep sensitivity beneath Will’s reserved, formal manner.

Some are eliminated quickly, and we don’t really get to know them much. But Will offers each a chance to experience a little of the life they have observed on the POV feeds but will not have, a kindness that other interviewers don’t offer. We witness a few of those, some of the drama’s most poignant moments.

The acting is impressive to say the least, particularly Winston Duke as Will, but extending to all the cast. Duke slowly peels back layers of the closed-in Will, showing us hints of the reason for the pain and sadness we sense beneath his rigid veneer. Benedict Wong provides the perfect foil for Will’s reserve but it is the questioning Emma who really cracks his glassy surface.

While the whole story takes place in various rooms of Will’s house and the surrounding barren but bracing landscape, the film is opened up by beautiful, sweeping photography by cinematographer Wyatt Garfield which creates the perfect setting for Oda’s thoughtful, involving drama.

NINE DAYS offers an intriguing premise to explore human life, featuring impressive acting performance, skillful direction and striking photography, all woven into an affecting, thought provoking drama, in an impressive directorial debut. If you like good drama, good acting, and are intrigued by how differently people see the same thing, this excellent film should be on your list of ones to see.

NINE DAYS opens Friday, August 6, at Landmark’s Plaza Frontenac Cinema and other theaters.

RATING: 3.5 out of 4 stars

ANNETTE – Review

This weekend sees the release of a “follow-up” film to a delightful documentary I had the pleasure of reviewing about two months ago. Yes, you read that right. This can be called a “follow-up” rather than a sequel or even a “spin-off”. The previous feature doc in question was the adoring film “fan letter” from Edgar Wright all about the fifty-year-plus musical partnership of the Mael brothers, Ron and Russell, the duo behind the rock and roll band known as Sparks (that doc’s title was the fittingly-named THE SPARKS BROTHERS). The early part of that film told of the brothers’ love of film, as they delved into the “New Wave” classics of the 60s while in college, and made some “cinema” themselves. After their music success, they hoped to branch into the movies with proposed collaborations with (most famously) Jacques Tati and Tim Burton. To the Maels’ consternation, none of them materialized, and aside from their many music videos that were in near-constant rotation on MTV (yes, they ran music videos), their only feature film work was as themselves playing at an amusement park in the 70s Sensurround “potboiler” ROLLERCOASTER. But there was hope as the doc’s last minutes told of a movie musical that was going forward (they did both the songs and script). And here it is finally. That long-in-the-works Sparks-created flick is simply called ANNETTE.

Fittingly one of the first images we see is Ron and Russell in a recording studio as they lead the film’s opening song, which has the main characters and several minor ones singing and walking down the neon-lit nighttime streets of LA. They soon split up as the story unfolds. And, at its beginning, it’s a love story between two unlikely loves at the near-opposite ends of the entertainment industry. Ann (Marion Cotillard) is a celebrated operatic soprano, selling out orchestra halls and classical music venues all over the planet. Henry (Adam Driver) is a performance artist/stand-up comic, whose one-man show “The Ape of God” has a fervent following that packs the theatres nearly every night. And after he finishes his angry, often sick and twisted, rants he hops on his motorcycle and scoops up Ann, whisking her away from her “stage door” admirers, much to the delight of the “paparazzi and theTV show biz reports. Their passion leads to a secret wedding, and later to a daughter, Annette. But then things change, professionally at first. As Ann’s star continues to rise, Henry’s career begins a fast descent, as his fans reject his darker, more intimate screeds. A restorative vacation at sea ends in tragedy, which somehow inspires an unexpected, miraculous change in Annette. Could his daughter somehow inspire a new chapter in Henry’s life, or will Ann’s former accompanist, now an orchestra conductor (Simon Helberg) derail Henry’s plans for himself and his “uniquely gifted” baby girl?

Driver dominates this musical drama experiment as the glowering, mostly anti-social, angry all-the-time Henry, only managing a semi-smile when he’s around Ann or his infant. Luckily he possesses a strong singing voice, which helps in advancing the tale somewhat. And though he’s clearily a parody of the stadium-filling 1990s misogynistic mega-stars, his Henry never really commands the stage despite his turning his microphone into a nose-smashing bolo, Cotillard is a more serene, calming presence as Ana, though her singing voice doesn’t quite fill the cavernous venues we see her work, and often a considerable distance from the audience. And while she conveys well Ann’s explosion of erotic ecstasy, we can’t quite buy them as a domestic couple, as Henry looms over Ann at every other moment. Helberg lightens things up a bit as the never-named “conductor” (which Henry calls him in a song as “my conductor friend”), especially in his big solo number. As he details his unfulfilled passion for Ann, he tells us “Excuse me for a moment” as he whips a full orchestra (and a chorus) into a rousing crescendo.

Oh my, where to start. Yes, that opening group number is catchy, but the rest of the songs just evaporate as they drift past our ears. Now there are stretches of spoken dialogue, but the singing drops in at the oddest times, almost to the point of camp. Henry can warble a melody as he…well…performs his “husbandly duties” in one of many achingly awkward sex scenes. Ah, but Ann gets equal time as she tosses off a tune while smoking and “takin’ care a’ bizness'” while on the “throne”. Oh, about the smoking…yecch! Driver’s Henry puffs away while shadow-boxing and eating a banana (!) in prep for his concerts (he really chain-smokes through the whole darn thing). And when he does make his stage entrance he sputters and hacks as he complains about the cloud of stage smoke (ala solo singers) he walks through. And who knows why he tosses off the chorus of Tom Lehrer’s “National Brotherhood Week” (now there’s a classic song), much to the delight of his lemming-like fans, who along with a quartet of lady singers (a comic has backup singers) form a massive “Greek chorus”. This is one of many bizarre choices of director Leos Carax. A scene at sea has a rear projection backdrop that would be more at home in a 50s “B” picture. But I’m skirting around the “elephant in the room”, namely the title character of Annette. Though she’s hidden in the trailer, other media news outlets have let the “secret” out. It is a puppet, or to be more precise a marionette, one that looks to have hopped (or skittishly glided) out of an early 70s Gerry Anderson kids sci-fi show. When I came to the realization, I was stunned (I can imagine movie audiences with their mouths agape similar to the reaction to “Springtime for Hitler” in the 1967 THE PRODUCERS). A friend explained to me how a doll or puppet is a staple of stage operas. Well, this is a movie and it couldn’t be more distracting. Whew, glad I vented. But this is representative of the stilted script from the Maels brothers that combines elements of so many basic cable TV “marriage misery” films with, not joking here, the theme of the Chuck Jones Looney Tunes classic “One Froggy Evening” (sorry Mr. Jones and Michigan J.) This is pretentious “artsy-schmartzy” drek that aspires to be a scathing commentary on the times. I just hope that theatre owners make sure that their now spartan staff have plenty of “return” screening passes for patrons who can’t make it through all 140 excruciating minutes (it would be barely tolerable as an extended music video or an experimental short), I think the “Sparks brothers’ are talented music-makers, but…maybe Tati and Burton really wisely listened to their instincts. At least I can say that the scenes of LA at night, as Henry races down the Sunset Strip, are well done. But as for the drivel around those scenes, well, somebody please toss a net over ANNETTE (let me at least delight in a pun)! Hey Geppetto, come get yer’ kid!

One-Half Out of 4

ANNETTE is now playing in select theatres