ALOHA – The Review

Summer’s settling in, the kids are out of school, so how about a vacation? Or at least a visit to the multiplex to take in a very popular vacation spot. And you wouldn’t be leaving the good ole’ US of A! I’m referring to our 50^th state, Hawaii. So who will you be traveling with on this cinematic stay in the Pacific’s paradise? Well, it’s a gaggle of true, “big deal” Hollywood actors and actresses. So, was it the mild temps and gorgeous beaches that lured this impressive cast here? It didn’t hurt, but the main lure may have been the chance to work with the celebrated author/director Cameron Crowe. After leaving the pages of Rolling Stone magazine, he contributed the script for the seminal 80’s teen comedy/drama FAST TIMES AT RIDGEMONT HIGH. When he took on directing in 1989, he made a string of iconic classics beginning with SAY ANYTHING, then SINGLES, JERRY MAGUIRE, and, in 2000, ALMOST FAMOUS. But then a series of missteps started a downward spiral: VANILLA SKY, ELIZABETHTOWN, and the saccharine family flick WE BOUGHT A ZOO. So, can Mr. Crowe take the reins of his film career and correct the trajectory? Will the friendly islands prove to be a rejuvenator in his new comedy/drama/romance ALOHA?

A barrage of 1950’s and 60’s newsreel and home movie footage during the opening titles tell us of Hawaii’s importance to NASA during the great “space race”. But then funding was cut and the stars were explored (and exploited) by the rich entrepreneurs. Working for one of the “one-percent” is former military man Brian Gilcrest (Bradley Cooper). Seems he left the service after taking some bullets during a botched operation in Kabul. He’s not been back to the islands in 13 years, when he broke up with Tracy Woodside (Rachel McAdams), who’s now married to armed forces pilot, and Brian’s new pal, the silent, stoic “Woody” (John Krasinski). Oh, and they’ve got two kids: precocious eight-year-old Mitchell (Jaeden Lieberher) and thirteen-year-old (Hmmm?) Grace (Danielle Rose Russell). As Brian re-unites with Tracy on the airport tarmac, he’s introduced to his military liaison/guide Allison Ng (Emma Stone), who’s all business, and part Hawaiian. They need to meet with somewhat hostile local native royalty to obtain a “blessing” for part of the new satellite launching plans for Brian’s boss, tele-communications titan Carson Welch (Bill Murray). As the project moves forward, Brian and Allison clash and eventually develop a relationship, just as the Woodside homestead begins to crumble. Brian then begins to question his life and loyalties during this very eventful homecoming.

Oh boy, the cast can’t be faulted for this since they’re really giving it their best shot. This script is just dramatic quicksand. Cooper shows us a bit of the darkness evident in roles like the recent SERENA, but his Brian often comes off as brusk and too cynical. A third act change of heart never really rings true. The usually effervescent and delightful Stone (the best part of the last Spider-Man reboot) is saddled with one of the most irritating movie characters in recent memory. For the flick’s first half hour, her Allison over-enunciates and mugs shamelessly. Happily she does soften a bit after a meeting with the natives (she is a true believer in the island magic? Huh?) while her big emotional shift also seems mighty forced and convenient plot-wise. McAdams seems to exist just to needle Cooper and is never give a real chance to flesh out the stressed-out Tracy. Happily Krasinki is spared much of the insipid dialogue and uses his TV comedy training to great effect as we must “read’ him through his eyes and body language. Actually, the best part of the film may be the silent exchange between him and Cooper that’s humorously subtitled. Murray exploits his “ultra-cool” persona as he hovers through his meager scenes. Alec Baldwin is brought in for some of his patented seething, screaming bluster in almost a cameo role (still no match for his similar turn in GLENGARY GLEN ROSS). Danny McBride seems to exist as a plot driver and sounding board while his affectation (constantly wiggling his fingers) proves to be an annoying distraction. The lovely Russell merely seems to glide through the scenes while the overly energetic Lieberher (so good in ST VINCENT) merely seems to be riffing on the “smart kid” in JERRY MAGUIRE (except he’s now into the space program, Hawaiian myths, and camcorders). You can’t say these guys and gals ain’t’ tryin’!

Trouble is that the odds, in the form of a clunky script, and tepid direction, are against the cast. The film lurches from one pointless sequence to the next until a heavy-handed bit of techno-gobledy-gook is used for a big dramatic finish. That is,until a big romantic finish followed by a painfully maudlin finish. I’m rooting for Crowe to get back on track and once again deliver another heart-tugging tale of real human emotion. Here he’s hammering in a message and pummeling us with pop tunes while lingering far too long on characters locked in strained close-ups. What a mess (I’ll steer clear of island clichés like calling the film “spoiled poi”). Better luck next time to all involved. Of the word’s two meanings, I’ll say a hasty goodbye to ALOHA.

1.5 Out of 5