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FREE BIRDS – The Review

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The thought of time traveling turkeys should be enough to interest anyone in Relativity’s new Thanksgiving film FREE BIRDS. Unfortunately, all you get is a cold turkey.

In FREE BIRDS, Reggie is saved from a life of certain death on a turkey farm by the President of the United States, who has chosen him as “The Pardoned Turkey”. While enjoying his new life at the White House, Reggie thinks he has it made from here on out. He’s sadly mistaken. One night, a turkey named Jake plucks him from his new home, and takes him on a journey back in time, to the first Thanksgiving, to take turkeys off the menu.

The film itself is cute enough, but it left me with the feeling “I’ve seen it, and never need to sit through it again”. It’s a fun enough film for families to take their little ones to before, or even on Thanksgiving, but by next year… no one will remember this film.

Owen Wilson and Woody Harrelson lend their voices to the two main characters of Reggie and Jake. The two of them really have a great chemistry together. Amy Poehler was also a fun voice in this film. She plays Jenny, a turkey from the past, and Reggie’s love interest. My problem is not with the voice acting in this film. They all did a wonderful job. My problem is with the writing.

The film itself lacks something. I was not made to care about the fate of the turkeys as much as I should have due to a lack of character development, I don’t understand how Reggie could call to order pizza from the White House, but humans couldn’t understand him (was the pizza company just guessing that the gobbles on the other end of the phone wanted cheese pizza?), and I have no clue how someone thought that they could get away with mildly adding turkey slaughter to the beginning of a children’s movie. This film is a bit like BILL & TEDS EXCELLENT ADVENTURE without the excellent adventure. It’s just subpar. The whole film is just bizarre.

I will say this, visually, the film was a treat. The 3D was fun, and might be the only thing that keeps people interested in this film from start to finish. The film is just an awkward mess. You’d be better off popping in an old holiday favorite than going to see this in theaters.

OVERALL RATING: 2 out of 5 stars

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Nerdy, snarky horror lover with a campy undertone. Goonies never say die.