Category: Holidays

HOLIDAY MOVIES Streaming That Are Naughty And Nice

Horror/sci-fi and fantasy movie fans no longer need to give up their beloved genre when the November/December holiday season arrives. There’s plenty on the various streaming services that combine the Christmas tropes of elves, superheroes and Santa.

Here’s a look at one of our previous lists. https://www.wearemoviegeeks.com/2013/12/top-20-non-traditional-christmas-movies/

After searching around Netflix, Amazon Prime, HBO Max and Shudder, WAMG found an assorted list of films that either takes place during Christmas or during the festive season that are naughty as well as …nice.

But first check out what the streaming services have to offer on YouTube:

VIOLENT NIGHT

To hell with “all is calm.” From 87North, the bare-knuckle producers of Nobody, John Wick, Atomic Blonde, Deadpool 2, Bullet Train and Fast & Furious Presents: Hobbs & Shaw comes a holiday action-comedy that says you should always bet on red.

When a team of mercenaries breaks into a wealthy family compound on Christmas Eve, taking everyone inside hostage, the team isn’t prepared for a surprise combatant: Santa Claus (David Harbour, Black Widow, Stranger Things series) is on the grounds, and he’s about to show why this Nick is no saint.

The film also stars Emmy winner John Leguizamo (John Wick), Cam Gigandet (Without Remorse), Alex Hassell (Cowboy Bebop), Alexis Louder (The Tomorrow War), Edi Patterson (The Righteous Gemstones) and Beverly D’Angelo (National Lampoon’s Vacation franchise). Directed by razor-edged Norwegian director Tommy Wirkola (Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters, Dead Snow franchise).

https://www.amazon.com/gp/video/detail/amzn1.dv.gti.aab489de-9e9b-46ee-9323-00d4bd2fb041?autoplay=0&ref_=atv_cf_strg_wb

SHAZAM

It is set during the holidays and is perfect for both superhero fans as well as movie that you can watch with the whole family.

https://www.hbomax.com/feature/urn:hbo:feature:GYJB-UAPXG4rDKgEAAAAC

A CHRISTMAS HORROR STORY

An anthology filled with tales of zombie elves, ghosts and Krampus that’s horrifically jolly… plus stars William Shatner.

https://www.shudder.com/movies/watch/a-christmas-horror-story/0d2c9cf4d5b4ea00

ROBIN ROBIN

Let us take you back to the Annecy International Animation Festival, 2018 to tell you about the moment when the idea for Robin Robin finally hatched. Picture two young – award-winning animators, Dan Ojari and Mikey Please, who had been sitting on the idea for a Christmas story, involving a Robin raised by loveable rodents, keeping the idea warm for several years.

Bronte Carmichael (Christopher Robin, On Chesil Beach) voices Robin, a beguiling little bird with a slight identity crisis, Oscar® nominee Richard E Grant (Can You Ever Forgive Me?) voices Magpie, an obsessive collector of shiny stuff who takes her on a journey of self-discovery. Golden Globe® winner Gillian Anderson (The Crown, Sex Education) voices the villainous Cat who stands between them, a sandwich and a Christmas star and BAFTA award winning Adeel Akhtar (Utopia, Four Lions, Murdered by My Father ) voices Dad Mouse, a caring but cautious soul who is single-handedly raising a family of five children – one of whom happens to be an adopted Robin.

NETFLIX: https://www.netflix.com/title/81058433

FATMAN

To save his declining business, Chris Cringle (Mel Gibson), also known as Santa Claus, is forced into a partnership with the U.S. military. Making matters worse, Chris gets locked into a deadly battle of wits against a highly skilled assassin (Walton Goggins), hired by a precocious 12-year-old after receiving a lump of coal in his stocking. ‘Tis the season for Fatman to get even, in the action-comedy that keeps on giving.

Funniest scene: Herman the Elf aka #7 (Michael Dyson) discusses elf physiology in the cafeteria with the military personnel.

https://www.peacocktv.com/watch-online/movies/action/fatman/363f9153-b767-373a-8da8-82662804496e

KRAMPUS

If there is one movie you must watch during the holidays, make it Mike Dougherty’s KRAMPUS! As the fabled big guy terrorizes a family, it’s entertaining twist ending, along with killer gingerbread men,  is the reason it makes this list. Listen out for Douglas Pipes’ haunting score too.  

Read our review: https://www.wearemoviegeeks.com/2015/12/krampus-the-review/

https://www.peacocktv.com/stream-movies/krampus

DIE HARD 1 & 2

Yes, they are Christmas movies set during the holidays! John McClane (Bruce Willis) taking on bad guys during Christmas – what more could anyone ask?!

https://www.starz.com/us/en/movies/die-hard-47011

https://www.amazon.com/gp/video/detail/amzn1.dv.gti.b0a9f6fa-a155-4fcf-3779-44b47105d67c?autoplay=0&ref_=atv_cf_strg_wb

RARE EXPORTS: A CHRISTMAS TALE

A true gem of an unconventional Christmas story, read our review: https://www.wearemoviegeeks.com/2013/12/rare-exports-christmas-tale-dvd-review/

“Rare Exports is one of the smartest, funniest and most well thought out films I have seen in quite a while and it is perfect for the holidays. Some other websites that have reviewed this film state that it is not for children’s viewing! Nonsense! Rare Exports, among other things, is a very canny updating of the type of fairy tales told by The Brothers Grimm, it is perfect for children! Snuggle up with your kids on Christmas Eve and enjoy! If this movie doesn’t make them behave nothing will!”

https://www.peacocktv.com/watch-online/movies/rare-exports-a-christmas-tale/59f81e34-a1d5-3f71-b368-431bd6d34713

LETHAL WEAPON

Set during Christmas time, Mel Gibson and Danny Glover give a different meaning to the buddy cop drama set in Los Angeles during the holiday season in director Richard Donner’s movie. And to throw in some extra marshmallows to that hot chocolate, the screenplay is from Shane Black (PREDATOR).

HBO MAX: https://play.hbomax.com/page/urn:hbo:page:GXeldRgFaYLPDfgEAAA8M:type:feature

PROMETHEUS

Okay so hear us out. Apparently hundreds of years from now, set in deep space, we will still be celebrating the season by decorating a Christmas Tree while searching for “Engineers” and “Xenomorphs” which was an interesting human touch in Ridley Scott’s PROMETHEUS.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kQDSNW1INzI

https://www.amazon.com/gp/video/detail/amzn1.dv.gti.22a9f764-f160-ff25-6ca6-5b0fbf456746?autoplay=0&ref_=atv_cf_strg_wb

SANTA’S SLAY (2005)

‘TWAS THE FRIGHT BEFORE CHRISTMAS… Hate to be the bearer of bad news — especially at Christmas but you’ve all been lied to… Santa (former WWE star Bill Goldberg) is not a jolly old man with a big smile handing out toys to good children, he’s the son of Satan who lost a bet 1,000 years ago and was forced into spreading Christmas cheer. Now his 1,000 years are up and he’s after one thing…REVENGE. Finally, his true colours are showing, and he’s taking out his anger on the residents of a small American town. Teenager Nicholas Yuleson finds out that his grandfather is actually the angel who won the bet and now that it is over, Santa Claus wants payback. Nicholas and his girlfriend Mary (Lost star Emilie De Ravin) try to escape from the Killer Claus and find a way to stop his reign of terror before it’s the end of Christmas as we know it.

SANTA’S SLAY has one of the funniest opening scenes in a horror movie. As Bloody Disgusting puts it, Evil Santa starts off by “slaughtering the likes of Fran Drescher, Chris Kattan, and James Caan. He even kicks a dog into a ceiling fan after massacring the unlucky C-list stars.” https://bloody-disgusting.com/videos/3474950/kill-week-dinner-party-massacre-santas-slay/

https://www.amazon.com/gp/video/detail/amzn1.dv.gti.faa9f789-fbc2-04eb-f0b9-238a3f5b5000?autoplay=0&ref_=atv_cf_strg_wb

THE NIGHT BEFORE

“These three not-so-wise men will stuff your stockings with lots of laughs and a bit of heart on THE NIGHT BEFORE.” Starring Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Seth Rogen and Anthony Mackie, the tagline read, This holiday season, don’t miss these 3 dudes, bros, and ride or die homies have the ultimate last Christmas night out! Director Jonathan Levine’s movie won’t disappoint.”

Review: https://www.wearemoviegeeks.com/2015/11/the-night-before-2015-the-review/

Amazon to rent: https://www.amazon.com/gp/video/detail/amzn1.dv.gti.88a9f797-944c-0743-7f09-58e92c315293?autoplay=1&ref_=atv_cf_strg_wb

BETTER WATCH OUT

When you think the suburbs, you think safety, but this holiday night the suburbs are anything but safe. Ashley (Olivia DeJonge) thought this babysitting job was going to be an easy night, but the night takes a turn when dangerous intruders break in and terrorize her and the twelve-year-old boy, Luke (Levi Miller), she’s caring for. Ashley defends her charge to the best of her ability only to discover this is no normal home invasion in this off-beat 2017 movie.

https://www.peacocktv.com/watch-online/movies/horror/better-watch-out/5ae04488-3118-39e6-9dc4-281691cf455b

FRED CLAUS

Vince Vaughn’s “Fred Claus” is all sorts of bitter at the success of his brother… wait for it… Santa Claus (Paul Giamatti). After growing up in saintly Nick’s shadow, Fred becomes a grouch who’s lost his belief in Christmas. Then, one magical December, Fred flies north (first class via reindeer) to find brother Nick is in trouble: a scheming efficiency expert is out to shut down Christmas forever!

Most hilarious scene of the film: Fed-up with the workshop’s DJ Donnie “you’re acting like an untrained dog” playing nothing but “Here Comes Santa Claus”, Fred enters Donnie’s booth, stops the record, and tosses him into a cabinet. Fred and the elves start partying to “Rubberneckin'”.

Elves cheerin’!

HBO Max: https://play.hbomax.com/feature/urn:hbo:feature:GXt6Z6wemNSrDVQEAAAAL

SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE MARTIANS

As WAMG wrote of the film:

“Even though SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE MARTIANS is often listed as one of the ‘worst movies ever made’, it’s not as bad as you would think. The story is simple: Santa Claus is kidnapped by Martians to provide joy and toys to the children of Mars when they become overly depressed. Sounds like an ingredient for one of the worst movies of all time, right? Wrong! This movie is pure entertainment from beginning to end! It doesn’t ever get REALLY boring, instead having long stretches of goofy comedy that isn’t funny for the right reasons. The acting is mediocre at best, but I did like the sets they used. Very surrealistic, in my opinion. There is plenty of great dialogue to laugh at (i.e, “I wasn’t sleeping! I just haven’t been able to sleep these past few nights…I forgot how! So I was just practicing!”), most of it coming from clumsy Droppo, “the laziest man on Mars!”. The little children who are kidnapped by the Martians are a mix of wooden and dedicated. Of course, some scenes’ inadequacy are inexcusable! The polar bear costume is obviously fake and the Martian guns are Whammo Air Blasters that freeze people (who manage to keep moving and blinking, for some reason)! And it stars a 10-year old Pia Zadora as ‘Girmar’!

Scenes to watch for: the Martians use the robot Torg to kidnap Santa, but Santa makes him into a toy!; the ‘suspenseful’ space door scene; the ‘amazing’ toy conveyor belt; Droppo passing as Santa (antennae and all); and the final showdown between Voldar and Santa, utilizing bubbles, water guns, soldiers, and other conveniently placed toys! SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE MARTIANS is pure entertainment, in my opinion, and all those who speak against should be sent to Mars!”

Don’t miss SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE MARTIANS https://pluto.tv/on-demand/movies/santa-claus-conquers-the-martians-1963-1-1?utm_medium=textsearch&utm_source=google

Tom Hardy, Daniel Craig, Judi Dench, Maggie Smith Read “Twas The Night Before Christmas”

Daniel Craig, Tom Hardy, Judi Dench, Maggie Smith, Joanna Lumley joined Prince Charles in a reading of ” ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas… “

The poem was recorded in support of the Actors’ Benevolent Fund, of which The Prince of Wales has been Patron for over 20 years taking over the role from Her Majesty The Queen in 2000.

The charity supports actors and stage managers who are unable to work due to illness, injury or old age and those experiencing financial hardship particularly during the Coronavirus pandemic.

This year has been particularly difficult for those working in the industry and in April the charity launched an Emergency Grant Fund to support those in their profession who are experiencing financial hardship owing to the pandemic.

THE MANDALORIAN Holiday Gift Guide

Who doesn’t love The Mandalorian on Disney Plus. Here’s a few ideas for the holidays.

The force is strong with the new The Child Chia Pet from Star Wars’ “The Mandalorian”! Affectionately known as “Baby Yoda” to fans, The Child is now the cutest Chia Pet ever! And with even more exciting new Chia Pets and beloved classics, you’re sure to find a Chia Pet for everyone on your list.

Star Wars and The Clapper have joined forces to create the Darth Vader talking Clapper. Beautifully sculpted in the shape of Darth Vader’s iconic helmet, this talking Clapper will be sure to delight the Star Wars fan on your list. 

The Darth Vader Talking Clapper is a fun and easy way to turn on the lights, TV and other frequently-used appliances in your Empire with a simple clap of your hands. Just plug a lamp, a radio, or any other device into this cool Clapper in the design of Vader’s iconic black helmet, and switch it on and off with the power of your bare hands. The legendary Sith Lord speaks every time you trigger him, with quotes like: “You underestimate the power of the Dark Side.”

The Clapper has been celebrated by customers and pop culture for over 30 years. With the new Talking Clappers there is now a Clapper for everyone. Turning to the Light and Dark Side has never been so much fun.

Check out talking Clappers at http://www.clapon.com.

Also available is the ORIGINAL CLAPPER Sound-Activated Switch. Chia Pets are available in participating stores like Walgreens, CVS, Rite Aid, Lowes, Target, and Walmart.

Also available online at Amazon.com. Check all the available styles on http://www.chia.com

The music for the show has been fantastic. For those who love film scores, this is a must-have.

Walt Disney Records releases the digital soundtrack from Season 2 of “The Mandalorian,” Lucasfilm’s multiple Emmy®-winning live-action series, streaming exclusively on Disney+. The Mandalorian Season 2, Volume 1 (Chapters 9-12) digital album features score by Oscar®, Grammy® and Emmy® winning composer Ludwig Göransson (Tenet, Black Panther) and is available HERE.

The release will be followed by The Mandalorian Season 2, Volume 2 (Chapters 13-16) digital album available on December 18.

Earlier this year, Göransson won his first Emmy for “The Mandalorian” “Chapter 8: Redemption” in the Outstanding Music Composition For A Series (Original Dramatic Score) category. For the first season of “The Mandalorian,” Göransson released eight full-length albums, one album per episode, with recurring themes throughout the season. This season, he will release the soundtrack in two volumes containing new musical themes, sounds and ideas.

The score and character themes feature instruments played by Göransson including the bass recorder, woodwinds, drums, guitars, piano and percussion. The organic elements from those instruments are then infused with tech sounds and a cinematic orchestra.

The Child in Lucasfilm’s THE MANDALORIAN, season two, exclusively on Disney+. © 2020 Lucasfilm Ltd. & ™. All Rights Reserved.

While pursuing his masters degree in film scoring at USC, Göransson met his other longtime collaborator, director Ryan Coogler, when he scored his short film, Locks. Over the next nine years, Göransson would score all three of Coogler’s feature films.

Much like iconic filmmaking duos Hitchcock and Herrmann or Spielberg and Williams, Coogler’s diverse filmography has allowed Göransson to show his range as a composer, writing understated melodies for Fruitvale Station, hyping up audiences for Creed, and infusing African percussion into his themes for Black Panther.  

Göransson has accumulated success in a variety of other films including the box office smash Venom and Pixar’s Inner Workings. In 2019, Göransson earned multiple awards and nominations for his score for Black Panther including a Golden Globe nomination, a Grammy Award for Best Score Soundtrack, and an Academy Award for Best Original Score. He won two Grammy Awards for his song “This is America”, which he co-wrote and co-produced with frequent collaborator Childish Gambino. 

Most recently, Göransson completed the score for Season 2 of The Mandalorian, LucasFilm’s first Star Wars live-action series helmed by director Jon Favreau, streaming exclusively on Disney+.  In September 2020, he won his first Emmy Award for his work on the series.  Göransson also composed the music for Christopher Nolan’s Tenet, which premiered late summer 2020.  In addition, he co-wrote and co-produced the songs for DreamWorks’ Trolls World Tour with Justin Timberlake, which exceeded expectations with its history-making digital releasein April 2020, racking up nearly $100 million in sales in just three weeks.

Plus there’s Mando Mondays. https://www.starwars.com/mando-mondays

DK Publishing will soon take you inside the world of The Mandalorian like never before.

StarWars.com is thrilled to offer a first look at The Mandalorian: The Ultimate Visual Guide, an image and info-rich deep dive into Emmy Award-winning Disney+ series. Featuring new details on the worlds, weapons, characters, and creatures of The Mandalorian, it’s sure to be a bounty well-worth tracking down. Check out the never-before-seen cover, sporting a striking image of the Mandalorian, below!

The Mandalorian: The Ultimate Visual Guide cover

“It’s such a rich corner of the galaxy that The Mandalorian has revealed, and it’s exciting to be able to chronicle it in detail,” author Pablo Hidalgo of the Lucasfilm Story Group tells StarWars.com. “DK is once again bringing their wonderful visual design work and showcasing the series as only they can.”

The Mandalorian: The Ultimate Visual Guide arrives July 6, 2021, and is available for pre-order now.

After the latest episode of The Mandalorian every Friday, visit MandoMondays.com every Monday to see the latest and greatest products inspired by the series and join the conversation on social media using #MandoMondays.

Warner Bros. Fall/Holiday Preview Includes A First Look At Clint Eastwood’s HEREAFTER

Warner Bros Pictures has released their film schedule for the upcoming fall/holiday season. The one that I found the most curious was this first photo of Matt Damon and Bryce-Dallas Howard in Clint Eastwood’s HEREAFTER. Variety’s article from 2008 said, “it is described as in the vein of THE SIXTH SENSE.” I’m very interested to see what Eastwood does with this genre.

The other films in the WB press kit are THE TOWN, LEGEND OF THE GUARDIANS: THE OWLS OF GAHOOLE, LIFE AS WE KNOW IT, HEREAFTER, DUE DATE, HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS – PART 1, and YOGI BEAR.

THE TOWN (Crime Drama) September 17:

There are over 300 bank robberies in Boston every year. And most of the professionals live in a one-square-mile neighborhood called Charlestown. One of them is Doug MacRay, but he is not cut from the same cloth as his fellow thieves. Unlike them, Doug had a chance at success, a chance to escape following in his father’s criminal footsteps. Instead, he became the leader of a crew of ruthless bank robbers, who pride themselves on taking what they want and getting out clean. The only family Doug has are his partners in crime, especially Jem, who, despite his dangerous, hair-trigger temper, is the closest thing Doug ever had to a brother. However, everything changed on the gang’s last job when Jem briefly took a hostage: bank manager Claire Keesey. When they discover Claire lives in Charlestown, Jem gets nervous and wants to check out what she might have seen. Knowing what Jem is capable of, Doug takes charge. He seeks out Claire, who has no idea that their encounter is not by chance or that this charming stranger is one of the men who terrorized her only days before. As his relationship with Claire deepens into a passionate romance, Doug wants out of this life and the town. But with the Feds closing in and Jem questioning his loyalty, Doug realizes that getting out will not be easy and, worse, may put Claire in the line of fire. Any choices he once had have boiled down to one: betray his friends or lose the woman he loves. “The Town” is a dramatic thriller about robbers and cops, friendship and betrayal, love and hope, and escaping a past that has no future.

Cast: Ben Affleck, Rebecca Hall, Jon Hamm, Jeremy Renner, Blake Lively, Titus Welliver, Pete Postlethwaite, and Chris Cooper. 

This film has been rated R for strong violence, pervasive language, some sexuality and drug use.

LEGEND OF THE GUARDIANS: THE OWLS OF GAHOOLE (Fantasy Adventure) In 3D and 2D in select theatres and IMAX on September 24:

Acclaimed filmmaker Zack Snyder makes his animation debut with the fantasy family adventure. The film follows Soren, a young owl enthralled by his father’s epic stories of the Guardians of Ga’Hoole, a mythic band of winged warriors who had fought a great battle to save all of owlkind from the evil Pure Ones. While Soren dreams of someday joining his heroes, his older brother, Kludd, scoffs at the notion, and yearns to hunt, fly and steal his father’s favor from his younger sibling. But Kludd’s jealousy has terrible consequences—causing both owlets to fall from their treetop home and right into the talons of the Pure Ones. Now it is up to Soren to make a daring escape with the help of other brave young owls. Together they soar across the sea and through the mist to find the Great Tree, home of the legendary Guardians of Ga’Hoole—Soren’s only hope of defeating the Pure Ones and saving the owl kingdoms.

Cast: Emily Barclay, Abbie Cornish, Ryan Kwanten, Anthony LaPaglia, Miriam Margolyes, Helen Mirren, Sam Neill, Richard Roxburgh, Geoffrey Rush, Jim Sturgess, Hugo Weaving, David Wenham.

This film has been rated PG for some sequences of scary action.

LIFE AS WE KNOW IT (Romantic Comedy) October 8:

Holly Berenson (Katherine Heigl) is an up-and-coming caterer and Eric Messer (Josh Duhamel) is a promising network sports director. After a disastrous first date, the only thing they have in common is their dislike for each other and their love for their goddaughter, Sophie. But when they suddenly become all Sophie has in the world, Holly and Messer are forced to put their differences aside. Juggling career ambitions and competing social calendars, they’ll have to find some common ground while living under one roof.

Cast: Katherine Heigl, Josh Duhamel, Josh Lucas, Christina Hendricks, Hayes MacArthur

This film has been rated PG-13 for sexual material, language and some drug content.

HEREAFTER (Drama) October 22:

HEREAFTER tells the story of three people who are haunted by mortality in different ways. Matt Damon stars as George, a blue-collar American who has a special connection to the afterlife. On the other side of the world, Marie (Cecile de France), a French journalist, has a near-death experience that shakes her reality. And when Marcus (Frankie/George McLaren), a London schoolboy, loses the person closest to him, he desperately needs answers. Each on a path in search of the truth, their lives will intersect, forever changed by what they believe might—or must—exist in the hereafter.

Cast: Matt Damon, Cécile de France, Jay Mohr, Bryce Dallas Howard, Marthe Keller, Frankie McLaren, George McLaren, Thierry Neuvic, Derek Jacobi.

The movie is not yet rated.

DUE DATE (Comedy) November 5:

Peter Highman (Robert Downey Jr.) is an expectant first-time father whose wife’s due date is a mere five days away. As Peter hurries to catch a flight home from Atlanta to be at her side for the birth, his best intentions go completely awry when a chance encounter with aspiring actor Ethan Tremblay (Zach Galifianakis) forces Peter to hitch a ride with Ethan—on what turns out to be a cross-country road trip that will ultimately destroy several cars, numerous friendships and Peter’s last nerve.

Cast: Robert Downey Jr., Zach Galifianakis, Michelle Monaghan, Juliette Lewis, Jamie Foxx

This film has been rated R for language, drug use and sexual content.

HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS – PART 1 (Fantasy Adventure) In 3D and 2D in select theatres and IMAX on November 19:

HARRY POTTER AND THE DEATHLY HALLOWS – PART 1, the seventh and final adventure in the Harry Potter film series, is a much-anticipated motion picture event to be told in two full-length parts. Part 1 begins as Harry, Ron and Hermione set out on their perilous mission to track down and destroy the secret to Voldemort’s immortality and destruction—the Horcruxes. On their own, without the guidance of their professors or the protection of Professor Dumbledore, the three friends must now rely on one another more than ever. But there are Dark Forces in their midst that threaten to tear them apart. Meanwhile, the wizarding world has become a dangerous place for all enemies of the Dark Lord. The long-feared war has begun and Voldemort’s Death Eaters seize control of the Ministry of Magic and even Hogwarts, terrorizing and arresting anyone who might oppose them. But the one prize they still seek is the one most valuable to Voldemort: Harry Potter. The Chosen One has become the hunted one as the Death Eaters search for Harry with orders to bring him to Voldemort…alive. Harry’s only hope is to find the Horcruxes before Voldemort finds him. But as he searches for clues, he uncovers an old and almost forgotten tale—the legend of the Deathly Hallows. And if the legend turns out to be true, it could give Voldemort the ultimate power he seeks. Little does Harry know that his future has already been decided by his past when, on that fateful day, he became “the Boy Who Lived.” No longer just a boy, Harry Potter is drawing ever closer to the task for which he has been preparing since the day he first stepped into Hogwarts: the ultimate battle with Voldemort.

Cast: Daniel Radcliffe, Rupert Grint, Emma Watson, Helena Bonham Carter, Robbie Coltrane, Tom Felton, Ralph Fiennes, Michael Gambon, John Hurt, Miranda Richardson, Alan Rickman, Timothy Spall, Imelda Staunton, Bonnie Wright.

This movie is not yet rated.

YOGI BEAR (Live-Action/Computer Animated Adventure in 3D.) In 3D and 2D in select theatres on December 17:

Everyone’s favorite pic-a-nic basket-stealing bear comes to the big screen in “Yogi Bear.” Jellystone Park has been losing business, so greedy Mayor Brown decides to shut it down and sell the land. That means families will no longer be able to experience the natural beauty of the outdoors — and, even worse, Yogi and Boo Boo will be tossed out of the only home they’ve ever known. Faced with his biggest challenge ever, Yogi must prove that he really is “smarter than the average bear” as he and Boo Boo join forces with their old nemesis Ranger Smith to find a way to save Jellystone Park from closing forever.

Cast: Dan Aykroyd, Justin Timberlake, Anna Faris, Tom Cavanagh, TJ Miller, Andrew Daly.

This film is not yet rated.

Source: Warner Bros.

DVD Review: STAN HELSING

stan helsing

It’s very easy to hate a movie like this. It might as well be part of the SCARY MOVIE series, only it’s no where near as clever. Stan Helsing (Steve Howey)  is a stoner, douche bag, video store clerk who happens to be the descendent of Van Helsing, the famous monster killer that took out Dracula. On Halloween night several of films most famous monsters come to kill him, but first Stan has to drop off some tapes to the owner of the video store’s mother. Along the way they run into a lot of creepy people, but eventually get lost and trapped in a small cursed town where monsters come out after midnight. Now Stan has to save the people of the town, his friends, and live up to his destiny. Oh and he has to do it in a very terrible comedy with almost no laughs.

I honestly hated everything about this movie and had a very VERY hard time sitting through it. It’s jut on the cusp of seemingly like anyone actually tried. It’s several performances that are just bland and boring all around. The villains are bad rip offs of Pin Head, Leatherface, Freddy, Michael Myers and some others and they’re all idiots. What’s worse are there are moments that literally make no sense. One character comes out of the bathroom, did a costume change and then says “…does my vagina make me look fat?” To which the two men in the group start ranting and raving and then say no. It has nothing to do with anything, and you don’t see a vagina at all. It’s just awkward and unfunny. If they had panned down and she had some monstrous camel toe I might have understood.

Every single joke in this film fell flat. The only thing I laughed at was Leslie Neilsen’s appearance. It was surprisingly funny because he acted like a complete jerk. Most of the time Neilsen’s appearance in one of these films involves him playing some one slightly dumber than everyone around him. Here he’s sharp, witty and very biting. Nice change of pace. I guess it would have been redundant to have him playing a moron around an entire cast of people acting like morons.

You can’t really be surprised by how awful STAN HELSING is as a film. Director Bo Zenga has no directorial experience and is one of the writers on SOUL PLANE.  SOUL PLANE is one of the worst movies of all time and I’d have thought that anyone involved with creating it would have been banished from making more films. Sadly this isn’t the case. Zenga’s also responsible for writing STAN HELSING which explains the lack of any kind of humor.

Mac is Back in ‘H2’

h22

Just a quick note here.   Apparently there have been rumors going around that Malcolm McDowell would not be returning to reprise his role of Dr. Sam Loomis in ‘H2’.   Rob Zombie slapped those rumors down on his Myspace page.

Rumors have it that Malcolm will not be returning as Dr. Loomis. Well, as usual the rumors are wrong. Malcolm McDowell will be back and ready to deal with big Mike.

So there!   ‘H2’ comes out on August 28th.

Source: Rob Zombie’s Myspace Page